Muchas gracias for our refrigerator full of food.

My husband brought home a horrible pig. It came to the kitchen and began to eat everything on its way. I didn’t know how to get rid of this pig. I prayed the Virgin of Guadalupe and she made so that pig ate my husband’s dinner. Thanks to that he took it to the ranch of his loyal friend.

All the red fruits and vegetables in my refrigerator were mysteriously disappearing. I was intrigued until one night I went to the kitchen for a glass of water and found out that a vegetarian vampire was the thief. I thank the Virgin of San Juan because my dog barked and growled and bit him. The vampire got so scared, he never came back. So it wouldn’t occur to him to change his diet and to suck my blood.

I thank Our Lady of Lourdes because we have enough money to fill our fridge with pork chump chops and pork knocks exclusively.

I thank my dear Saint Rita another time. Although my husband lost his interest and doesn’t watch our refrigerator with me for hours, I managed to persuade our son Miguel to keep me company. I also want to thank the saint for we renovated the kitchen.

I thank Saint Rita because after many prayers dressed to her we managed to buy a refrigerator. Although it’s a used one, it works just fine, like a new one. My husband and I, we watch for hours how it freezes and how beautiful it is.

Pedro Garcia and Veronica Jimenez were fucking when the refrigerating chamber door closed. They thank Saint Thomas Aquinas with this retablo for their boss saved them in time because they were about to become popsicles.

All the red fruits and vegetables in my refrigerator were disappearing. I was intrigued until one night I went to the kitchen for a glass of water and found out that the thief was a vegetarian vampire. I thank the Virgin of San Juan because my dog barked and growled and bit him. The vampire got so scared, he never came back, lest he decided to change his diet and to suck my blood.