I thank the Virgin of Guadalupe because Hugo isn’t angry with me anymore because “Chivas” (“Goats”) won 8–0–0 over “Cruz Azul” (“Blue Cross”), and he returned to me, and we’ve just celebrated 6 months together. I gave him a player Kikin t-shirt because it doesn’t matter to me if he’s so irritable, I love him as he is, and I don’t care what people say.

Perla, “Goat” in heart
Mexico City — June 2, 2006

I’m a very open-minded man and—I may admit—I’m a very good at performing the romantic ballads. I sing them with much sensuality. But when after my concert three homosexual martians came to my bedroom telling they love me I had enough. I got scared and prayed Saint Michael the Archangel for help. Thanks to the Archangel the martians were satisfied with a couple of songs and my autographs on their CDs and photos. Finally they went away, although I literally had to push them out because they wanted to kiss me.

The baseball player Jose F. was caught by his wife while a fan was giving him oral. He thanks Saint Thomas with the present retablo for he didn’t lose all his fortune after the divorce.

The wrestler Golden Pheasant thanks Saint Maroun with this retablo for the success he’s had with so many groupies and for he hasn’t caught any infection.

I’m a very liberal man and—I may confess—I’m a very good at performing the ballads. I do it with sensuality. But when after my concert on the Day of the Dead three skeletons came to my bedroom I had enough. Also I got scared and prayed Saint Michael the Archangel for help. Thanks to the Archangel the skeletons were satisfied with a couple of songs and my autographs on their CDs. I literally had to push them out because they wanted to kiss me goodbye.