— tagged with “bed”

My husband and I had problems in our love life. But thanks to herbs a witch gave me my husband has become a tiger in bed. Now we are happy and thank the Virgin.

Retablo by

When I married my sweet, delicate and beautiful fiancée I feel like the happiest man in the world. I didn’t know that this fragile being snored like a lion. I couldn’t imagine that a little mouth that looked like a rosebud could produce such terrible sounds. I loved her deeply but without being able to sleep my marriage turned into a nightmare. Then I implored the Virgin of Zapopan who, in her infinite mercy, worked a miracle, and my lovely wife stopped snoring. Now she just whistles but that doesn’t bother me. I give infinite thanks.

A hail storm ruined the roof of the corral. I thank the Virgin of San Juan because my husband, although reluctantly, let the animals sleep in the house until he could repair the roof and until it won’t be so cold outside.

Marina Rios

I was sick and was laying in the bed. One night, the Death came to my bedroom with the scythe, ready to take my life. I grabbed the crucifix to scare the Death, but he saw so many of them, he didn’t care. But my dog, however, seeing the bony legs and thinking that it was her dinner, ran joyfully for them. The Death got scared, ran away and never came back. Next morning I felt better. I thank the Virgin of Zapopan for saving my life.

— tagged with and , , , , , #

When I came back home after visiting my mother I saw some martians in my bedroom. They were drunk with lemonade. It seems that the lemons had had alcohol effect on the martians and they were in deep sleep. When I scream out of fear, they woke up and escaped through the window to their spaceship. On their way they picked up all the lemons from the trees. I thank the Virgin of San Juan for the martians didn’t do anything to me.

Since it was very hot night, I opened the window and turned on my new fan before going to sleep. But two crocodiles thought the fan was an enormous and delicious fly, because of its sound. So they got into my room to get it. I thank the Holy Spirit because I managed to escape from those stupid crocodiles.

— tagged with and , , #

I bought some quesadillas with mushrooms for the dinner so we could have something light that won’t give us any nightmares at night. But I couldn’t imagine they were so light. I saw my children getting up in the air from their beds and floating into the window like feathers and flying up to the Moon. I was scared they would be lost in space, so I invoked the Holy Child with the Ball. He made the miracle so my sons changed their direction and flew back to the house and back to their beds. Then I tied and rolled them into the blankets so they wouldn’t fly out again.

— tagged with and , , , , , #

My house had been invaded by bats. I was afraid they would suck my blood but got no success of scaring them out. Every night they flew around the house driving my cat and fog mad and depriving me of sleep. I prayed Saint Quiteria asking her for help, and the saint appeared as a bright light that scared the bats away, so they flew out the window and never came back. I thank the saint with this retablo for delivering me from this plague.

— tagged with and , , , , #

The night of June 22, 1962, a terrible nagual appeared in my bedroom. I was scared he might take me with him, so I prayed the Virgin of Guadalupe. She scared him off with her splendor, and the nagual took off with the tail between his legs.

Retablo by

— tagged with and , #

Every time when it was raining my wife put all the animals inside the house so they wouldn’t wet and sick. Then my wife went to sleep peacefully, and I couldn’t close my eyes. I was afraid that an egg might fall on my head or the pig would start licking my face. I thank the Virgin of Zapopan because we finally saved enough money to build a shed and a henhouse. Now the animals sleep there without getting wet, and I don’t have them around my bed.

I thank Saint Rita for helping me to save money for a California King bed. Now I can put two men in my bed at once without feeling cramped.

Retablo by

— tagged with and , , , #

I thank Christ of the Palm because when I was bedridden my friends arrived to perform an exorcism on me.

Retablo by

— tagged with and , , #

I met my love in the wrestling. Thank you, Virgin.