Andre was at the beat when the men heard a noise outside & found a huge crocodile blocking their exit. He thanks the Blessed Saint Freddy Mercury that everyone escaped without injury & without being arrested for public nudity. He vows to only visit beats far from the waterline in future.

Andre, Darwin, 2019

Infinite Thanks to Saint Leasa Mann, who offered to pay the bills of strangers who were struggling because they’d lost shifts or work during Covid. She doesn’t know this but because of her help, I was able to stay in my supportive queer sharehouse, instead of having to move back to country Victoria with my parents, & back into a deep dark closet.

Please paint me clubbing with lots of tattoos, because they are the first two things I’m going to do when lockdown is over.

Infinite Thanks to Cher, because without her I may never have had the courage to be out! I knew I was a lesbian at 6, but it wasn’t until I first saw her in 1971 on the first Sonny & Cher Show that I knew at 11, I had the courage to do anything! She inspired me to come out at 13 and be proud. Not bad for a poor Housing Commission girl in 1974! I will never forget the song “Half Breed” Cher, the horse, & the sexy extravagance. No wonder I rode my motorbike through the crowd at the Palais in St. Kilda at “An Extravagant Lesbian Night” with just a g-string, a cap & a whole lot of body oil! Thank you, Cher!

Irene Reenie Christodolou

I am thankful to the Blessed Genius who invented Bunnings. These Australian hardware stores have become de facto quee clubs for DIY queers, especially lesbians, to meet each other. On any given weekend the inner Melbourne Bunnings are teeming with cute bitches & masc sorts ogling the power tools, & handsome types lining up for their Bunnings sausages (not a euphemism). It really is homo heaven.

I give thanks to Saint Dolly, for leading me towards my perfect truck, which I have graced with your name and image. I enjoy many epic roadtrips and adventures with uberbabes and trucksluts in the Big Dolly truck.

Melbourne, 2019

I thought I was in love with both Fox Mulder and Dana Scully; but the more I obsessively watched the X-files, the more I realized that I was actually into Scully—her dour manner, independence, badassery, skepticism, intelligence, and the way she wielded a gun, & wore her pant suits. And how hot she looked in those pant suits. Infinite thanks to Saint Scully, for modeling the ideal love & partner for me, at a time when I didn’t even know that I was into girls.

P.S. Infinite thanks for Gillian Anderson, too.

Melbourne, 2019