I was coming back from the Xochimilco market in my boat feeling very happy because I had bought at a very good price five beautiful piglets to start breeding pigs with. My boat was old and quite damaged, so it started drowning because of the big weight. My piglets and I started drowning also. Thanks to the miracle of the Virgin of Zapopan—whom I’m very devoted to—we managed to float until we were saved by a tourist trajinera-boat. Although I lost my boat, I’m grateful that we are still alive and didn’t drown.

I went to swim into the sea and right away I felt something was holding me. Then I saw a big octopus. It caught me with its tentacles and pulled me down to the bottom. I started to panic, I was thinking I was going to die in the tentacles instead of marrying a handsome young man and living a happy life. I started to pray to the Virgin of San Juan, and thanks to her the octopus got distracted with some fish passing by and I could escape. I swam to the surface and I was safe. Now I only have to wait when a handsome guy comes to my life.

I was hanging my laundry on when my daughter went to the river and was taken by the current. I thank the Virgin of Zapopan because a dog appeared from nowhere and brought my daughter to the shore. After that the dog ran away. I know that dog was an angel sent by the Virgin to save my daughter.

When I fell overboard, I was saved by a dolphin. Thanks.

April 1969

I thank Saint Quiteria of Frexeiras for the miracle that I didn’t drown and she saved me when I fell in a pond on the farm.

Virgina Quiteria da S. Maia
Santa Brigida, Bahia

I went for a walk with my two suitors. I stumbled and accidentally fell into the river. The suitors ran to help me but since they both wanted to be a hero they pulled me in different directions. Finally, thanks to the miracle of the Virgin of Guadalupe I managed to get out by myself and didn’t drown. Then I decided to not go out with any of these idiots.

Gregorio fell from the fishing boat and hit his head. He lost his conscience, and when he regained it back he saw two mermaids pulling him in different directions—one to the top and the other to the bottom. That moment he entrusted his life to Saint Raphael the Archangel. He thanks him because the mermaid who pulled to the top won, and he got to the surface where his buddies could grab and save him. Although nobody believed in the mermaid story, he didn’t care because he stayed alive.

My children went to swim to the river. But suddenly a strong current under the mountain dragged them down to the river. I ran along the river frightened that I might lose them out of sight. I thank Saint Barbara because she put a fallen branch on their way. They managed to grab on it and then get out just very frightened of what happened.

I was swimming in the sea and suffered a cramp. I began to go deep down, but thanks to the Virgin of San Juan a beautiful mermaid came over and pulled me up to the surface. Then she dragged me to the beach. Although my friends don’t believe in what happened and laugh at me, it was a great miracle.

Rafael Vasquez went to the sea, got entangled in the seaweed and started to drown. He thanks the Virgin of San Juan with this retablo for saving his life and promises to be more careful.

Ofelia Gonzalez got disappointed in love, so she threw herself into the lake wearing her wedding dress, since she wouldn’t use it anymore. But it happened so a fisherman noticed her and saved her. Ofelia thanks the Virgin of Zapopan because she met a new love in her savior.

I, Timoteo Rodriguez Garcia, and his relatives dedicate this retablo because we almost drown in the strong current trying to cross the Rio Bravo following the American Dream before Donald Trump would build the wall. Crazy fucked up gringo, racist, ku-klux-klan, his whole country is Mexico, bald fatso. Long live the Mexican workers!

Los Angeles, California
June 18, 2017

I went to swim to the sea and immediately got so cramped, I went to the bottom. I had no air to breathe, and then dozens of crabs surrounded me and began to pinch me with their pincers. I thought I was going to die not only of lacking the air but, moreover, pinched by the crabs. But instead the crabs pulled me up to the surface and dragged me to the beach. Now I know it was a miracle made so I wouldn’t drown there.