I dedicate this retablo to the Virgin of Lourdes for protecting me and my clerk from heartless bandits who on April 20, 1970, entered in the branch of the National Rural Credit Bank. They were armed, they tied us and they gag us, but they didn’t murder us.

I thank Jesus for giving me positive proof that my dog Thunder is not the reincarnation of my landlord to whom I owed a lot of money.

I dedicate this retablo to Saint Bartholomew because I invented and patented a natural size model that reproduced, with some inaccuracies, the anatomy of the little boy about 3 years old. My son Enrique served as a model. I hope to sell it to the University of Guadalajara so that they do research on it as much as they like.

I dedicate this retablo to Saint Barbara for protecting me while I was surfing for the first time in the middle of a huge wave.

They were both so convincing that I couldn’t tell who the real Jesus.

I’m thanking the Virgin of Fatima for giving me enough strength to became the first parish priest in wrestling, even though I already have three imitators.

I dedicate this retablo to Saint Vladimir because I am having a great time in Vatican City.

I dedicate this retablo to the Virgin of Guadalupe because even thought I had only three piano lessons and could play only with one finger my dear grandfather gave me the opportunity to perform in a piano recital in one of the many theaters he owns in the capital. And according to my fiancée I didn’t make many mistakes and the audience remained pleased enough.

Mexico, May 1982

I give many thanks and dedicate this retablo to the Virgin of Carmen because my restaurant was going to be bankrupt when I got an idea to prepare a new dish with ground beef, potatoes, poblano pepper, tripe and vegetables. I put a price of 5 pesos on it, drink and coffee included. Now we can’t stop cooking, and we have became the most famous restaurant in the whole Queretaro. Thanks.

I’m thanking my dear Saint Martin de Porres because since I had my own band I can confuse and mock my musicians when without letting them know I change the rhythm of the melody making them look like inexperienced beginners in front of the audience.

I am vey happy because I will not have to use my bus to go on tour with The Grateful Dead so I dedicate this retablo to the Virgin Mary.

I dedicate this retablo to the Miraculous Virgin because she had blessed me with an amazing similarity to the very famous Italian-American singer Frank Sinatra. Thanks to that I’m always in demand for celebrations, weddings and christening parties in the whole state of Zacatecas.

Those alien beings must be atheists because they haven’t landed for the eucharist.