Javier Mayoral

My husband Gustavo and your humble servant, we dedicate this retablo to the Virgin of Chapi because after many years of marriage we decided to join a swinger club where we have a lot of fun with others married couples who enjoy the latex and the sadomasochism like we do.

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I give thanks and dedicate this retablo to the Virgin of Candelaria. Since my boyfriend left me no man looked at me. But now every morning when I wake up there is a very handsome older man near my window who stares at me.

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Thanks to Saint Katherine I found a very good “all inclusive” vacation package to the Dominican Republic.

I thank my Virgin of Toluca because not a long time ago I was unhappy working in a bank with a very small salary. But then I won the lottery, and now I’m having a real blast with my chicks. And I go in the bank every day to take more money.

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I give thanks to the Christ Almighty for protecting me and my horse Nevado (Snowy) on November 3, 1949. We were taking some passengers to the market in San Andres and the stallion was unbridled. The good Christ took pity on me, so neither I, nor Nevado got hurt. Although for the passengers it came out very badly.

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I thank the Lord Jesus Christ because I can take hot baths again after almost three months without electricity and water.

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Audition for the rock opera “Jesus Christ Superstar”.

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I thank Saint Beatrice because I found a tequila that doesn’t give me a horrible headache when I wake up in the morning.

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I dedicate this retablo to the Holy Child of Atocha. I was practically hopeless because of my addiction to all kinds of drugs and alcohol. But I found a good job in the church of the parish priest don Ernesto, who gives me shelter, clean clothes and good food.

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I thank the Virgin Mary because I was born with the brain of Marie Curie, the beauty of Jeanne Moreau and the kindness of Mother Teresa, Lady Diana or Maria Callas.

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I dedicate this retablo to the Miraculous Virgin, because thanks to her I met a group of very nice friends who invited me to drink sparkling wine with them. Then they tattooed all my body for very little money, and after they gave me a nice hat.

I dedicate this retablo to the Virgin of Carmen so that American people would elect John McCain as president because he is a patriot who often goes in the restaurant where my son works, in Phoenix, Arizona.

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We thank Jesus for creating Pong-Tron.

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