Teodoro Martinez has a relationship with two Venusians. We are deeply in love, and they came to live in my house.

Oaxaca, September 9, 1969

Martha Larios and Leonora Perez are very grateful for living together and very happy, in spite of public shaming. You gave us strength to go on and show that we love each other.

CDMX, 2021

Virgin of San Juan, I’m eternally grateful and dedicate you the present retablo for saving me from losing my left titty. It wasn’t cancer, and I avoided a surgery.

Señora Juana P.
Tacubaya, Mexico City, May 10, 2015

Marcos Urieta’s wife cheated on him with his friend. He did nothing to those two but threw them out naked in the street.

Mexico, 1979

I, Christofer Rodriguez, give infinite thanks to the Virgin of Guadalupe for the miracle of having a martian girlfriend who is so pretty and so hot, and she’s going to make me extraterrestrial children. Woohoo!

Mexico City, 1989

On my way back from work, I was kidnapped by some bastards. Finding myself in a deadly danger, I entrusted myself to God asking him not to let something bad happen to me. I was able to untie myself and, with their first slip-up, ran away. I didn’t care that I was naked, because in that way I saved my life.

Damaris M.
Santa Fe, Mexico, February 10, 2015

Virgin of San Juan, I thank you for giving me strength to give birth to my son at home, because I had a premature labour and couldn’t get to the hospital.

Maricarmen, Mexico City, 10–07–1996

In 1917, in the town of San Lucas, my buddy caught me on the mat with his wife. He started to shoot at us. I give thanks to the Virgin of Guadalupe because bullets didn’t hit me. She took them all.

Catarino M.

Virgin of Guadalupe, thank you for I didn’t sin with a very hot skeleton woman who came to me in the field. I wanted to take her in the field so bad but you delivered me from doing the bad thing.

Nicanor Lopez
Celaya, 1956

Luisa Ramos was modeling for an adult magazine, climbing on a tree. But the branch broke off, and she fell down. She thanks Saint Nicholas for she only broke her arm and will be back to her usual activities soon.

Infinite Thanks to Cher, because without her I may never have had the courage to be out! I knew I was a lesbian at 6, but it wasn’t until I first saw her in 1971 on the first Sonny & Cher Show that I knew at 11, I had the courage to do anything! She inspired me to come out at 13 and be proud. Not bad for a poor Housing Commission girl in 1974! I will never forget the song “Half Breed” Cher, the horse, & the sexy extravagance. No wonder I rode my motorbike through the crowd at the Palais in St. Kilda at “An Extravagant Lesbian Night” with just a g-string, a cap & a whole lot of body oil! Thank you, Cher!

Irene Reenie Christodolou

Elena Villa was the most brave of all the women soldiers. That’s why I make this exvoto in your name. God bless you.

Jalisco, 1949

Jessica Perez thanks the Souls of the Purgatory beaus her old man Hugo didn’t see Sancho Pepe under the bed. She pays for that with this retablo.

Polanco, 1983