I found Luis sleeping with the pigs. Please, Virgin, cure him.

Virgin of Guadalupe, thank you for your favors. I got involved with a real psychopath without knowing it. Suddenly he became mad with no reason. He was speaking incoherently and asking me whom I’d been cheating on him with. I told my father about Javier but he answered me that it was my fault that I’d got mixed up with a man like him. In the end, Javier stripped me down, tied my arms around a tree and flogged me. My father was coming by, he saw Javier beating me and shoot him in the leg. I was saved.

Maria Zoto
Tlaxcala, 1969

Juan Carlos Romero was taking shower when a horrible earthquake began. He thanks Saint Charbel with this retablo for he managed to get out of his apartment in time although he totally forgot to put his underwear on.

I had no water in my house so I went to take a bath to the river. When I finished and get out of the water, I found that a calf had eaten all my clothes except my shoes. Just a thought of going naked back home made me feel embarrassed. Mostly because I had to pass the Rodriguez’ house who are very lustful men. The Virgin of Guadalupe helped me—I found a tablecloth put out to dry off on the fence of a nearby house. I wrapped myself in it and ran to the house, and no one saw me.

Juana M. got drunk and had a brilliant idea to ride a bike naked. She thanks Saint Rita with this retablo for the police arrested her only for 48 hours.

Pedro and Juan thank the Virgin for being very happy.

An artist Gaudensio Ponce made a full-nude image of a wrestler’s wife. He thanks Saint Pancras for the wrestler liked his work and didn’t beat Gaudensio.

Manuel and Mario are happy. They love each other and thank the Virgin.

Mexico City — November 21, 2007

Agustin M. enjoyed having affair with married women until one day, when he had to escape through a window, he broke his leg. In addition to that, he was totally naked and got arrested for obscenity. He promises Saint Augustine to mend his ways.

Yolanda Rivera was caught by the police when she was swimming in a fountain. She thanks Saint Sebastian de Aparicio with this retablo because she spent only one night in jail. She promises to not be such an exhibitionist.

The Mendoza sisters were scared by a crocodile when they were swimming in the river. I thank Saint Isidor for the opportunity to watch those three Graces running totally naked. This memory will rejoice me on the lonely nights during my long course of life.

My husband Jose Juan was a sleep-walker. Since he slept naked, he ran out at night naked to dance in the corn field. I was afraid that something might happen to him or he would run to the town and somebody would see him naked. I was ashamed to ask the saint for help because of his nudity. Then I prayed to Saint Lucy, because she is blind and couldn’t possibly see my husband. She made a miracle, and now Jose Juan sleeps at night and doesn’t run.

Gustavo Suarez enjoyed spying on his master’s daughters while they were taking bath in the river. He thanks Saint Pancras with this retablo because when one of them noticed him, she didn’t report on him, and now they’re lovers.