Saint Expeditus, I ask you with this humble retablo to end this coronavirus pandemic because I miss my secretary Lucy. I cannot see her because of the quarantine, and I’m very desperate being locked in the house with my wife 24 hours a day. If it lasts any longer I’ll go insane.

Mexico, 2020

I thank the Holy Heart because I learnt to work with a yoke and don’t need my drunk husband anymore.

Fidelia Andrade was missing her late husband very much. But one day he appeared to keep her a company. Then she remembered what a pain in the ass he was. She thanks Saint Ignatius for giving her this lesson and doesn’t want to see her husband anymore.

Juaquina Carrion ran into her old man sleeping and beat him up. She kicked him so bad she thought he’d die. She prayed the Virgin of San Juan and her old man got cured. She thanks for that although he keeps on loafing.

Puebla, 1920

Saint Raymond, thank you because my buddy didn’t notice me under his bed where I hid myself avoiding a trouble to be seen with his wife when he arrived home. I offer you this retablo for the received favor. I ask you for forgiveness and swear to avoid such situation that insults our friendship, because to insult a friend is to insult for ever <...>

Bar “Come again”

I thank the Virgin of Guadalupe for the miracle of saving my life when my buddy put bullets into me thinking that I was in love with his wife.

Gabino M. — Mexico City, May 14, 1996

1998, German terrorists attacked the skyscraper where my ex-wife worked. I give thanks to Saint Golotea who gave me courage and strength to secretly infiltrate into, to kill 13 scroungers and save the Nakatomi plaza.

Because of my overweight, it was always a problem when my husband and I used to get intimate, since he’s thin and I crashed him. One night I was getting so excited I almost suffocated him when I got on top. I give thanks to Saint Pancras because I’m losing weight now. Otherwise, I’m afraid I would have got serious problems in my marriage because of my excessive pounds.

I, Jesus, thank you, St. Eek Yordick, for delivering me from dying. My lover’s husband caught us in the middle of lovemaking, and from the eight bullets he shot seven got to my lover and one hit the wall. I promise not to get involve with married women whose husbands have pistols.

I thank Holy Child of Atocha for helping me to keep my great secret. In reality it’s my wife who is the boss in our house and I’m just a henpecked husband. If it became known, it would damage my tough image among the fans and I’d be a joke for my fellows wrestlers. I bring this humble retablo.

The wrestler Black Storm
Tijuana, Baja California

Julio Estrada loved to dress up like Gene Simmons, and his wife loved his look very much.

Mexico, September, 16, 1988

Doña Sofia Ramos’ husband was a irresponsible drunkard. She and her daughter prayed the Virgin of Zapopan to get him back on the righteous path. Thanks to the Holy Virgin doña Sofia’s husband stopped drinking and found a good job.

My husband is a pretty boring type. But once a week he becomes a devil. I thank the Virgin of Guadalupe because these days make me happier and liven our marriage up not letting it getting worse too much.