I thank the Virgin of San Juan for Federico Rodriguez asked my hand in marriage. I was overwhelmed and said yes because he said he loves me more than his cow. He won that cow and goes everywhere with her. I don’t mind my boyfriend being eccentric because he is so cute, and the cow is really beautiful.

Every year, January 17, I ask my pupils to bring their pets to the class. Usually they bring cats, dogs, rats or turtles. But one kid brought a crocodile. I thank the Virgin of San Juan for the crocodile didn’t bite anybody and the boy’s father came right away after my call. The boy was grounded for a week.

My husband played dice with a circus owner and won an elephant. They were both drunk when they came home with the elephant. I thank the Virgin of San Juan because the circus owner sobered up and wanted to take the elephant back. He offered instead three circus dogs and ten tickets to the show. My husband was happy to take it because he also got sober and was afraid of his win. And the circus dogs turned out to be very cute and perform different tricks.

On the day of our wedding, there were a lot of doves at the doors of the church which is a good sign that means many years of happiness. We thank Saint Anthony for his blessings.

I was doing laundry and fell asleep. Suddenly I was awoken by my dog barking. I opened my eyes and saw some martians trying to tie me and take me to their ship. I started screaming. The extraterrestrials got scared and ran away. I thank the Virgin of Zapopan for my dog woke me up in time and, I think, even bit those martians.

Carlos Magaña, a sax player, thanks the Virgin of San Juan because his job gives him good money and every woman in the building where he lives is crazy about him and his music.

My son Manuel had a congestion because he went swimming right after having a meal. He fainted and went straight to the bottom of the lake. I thank the Virgin of the Rosary who sent a dog that pull the boy out of the water before he drowned. My son is all right now, and the dog has become our pet. We thank the Virgin.

I thank Saint Anthony. I was decorating the room for the spring holidays and lost my balance. I felt down from the ladder right to the doña Rosita’s son’s arms. He is very handsome, and we are dating.

Margarita Gomez

A real she-devil came to our town. She looked like a nice, well-educated, friendly lady, but my friends and I were afraid of her. There was always the sulphur smell after she left. But we were so scared and afraid that she could do something to us or our families, we couldn’t refuse to have her when she visited us. She always came for a tea, or a dinner. And she was very voracious. We thank the Blessed Sacrament because on the Holy Week the she-devil disappeared and we haven’t seen her since.

We thank the Virgin of Guadalupe, because despite our poverty we always have food on our table and there is a lot of love in our life.

My friend and I, both, were courting Mariana Alcantara, but she couldn’t decide whom to choose. One day she was playing on swings and accidentally hit me in the head with her leg. I was bleeding. Mariana saw my wound and was very worried about it, so she finally agreed to be my girlfriend. I thank the Virgin of Zapopan for this miracle.

My husband invited his mother and sisters to stay for a few days with us. I knew they are very demanding and it’s impossible to please them at the kitchen. I thank Saint Paschal for inspiring me to prepare delicious dishes. And the relatives, judging by their faces, remained satisfied with my cooking.

Two handsome men moved in our building. But then we found out that they turned into horrible vampires and flew out of the window by the calling of their insatiable thirst for young girls blood. My boyfriend and I thank the Virgin of San Juan for we aren’t two juicy chicks.