— tagged with “neighbors”

Doña Romanita Montiel felt very lonely, that’s why she implored Saint Pancras, and the next day a neighbor presented her to the painter Frida Kahlo who gave her a parrot. Now she’s not so lonely, and she’s infinitely grateful for that, although the parrot is very insolent.

Puebla, 1937

I give thanks to Saint Anthony the Great for having found a loyal dog who has become my real guard. I always go out to my garden to take the sun but my nosy neighbor used to look at me and pester me, and I felt insecure and uncomfortable. But now my Spike protects me.

Valentina Segura ~ Guadalupe, Nuevo Leon

Holy Virgin Mary, a neighbor wanted to revenge for the noise and set a building where I lived on fire. Thank you very much, Holy Virgin, for saving my piano from this terrible fire.

Catalina

I thank you, Virgin of the Solitude, for saving my life when the old man my neighbor caught me in his house and started shooting at me. Thanks you you I could escape with nary a scratch, just frightened.

Jasinto Lopez, Oaxaca, Mexico, 1968

When I came to the city to study in the university I didn’t have enough money to pay rent by myself alone. I found out that one girl, my fellow student, was looking for a girl neighbor to share an apartment with. Then I got an idea to tell her that I’m a gay so she would accept me. I give thanks to Saint Patrick because she didn’t find out that I’m a heterosexual so I could enjoy looking at her almost naked for she is very beautiful.

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I give due thanks to Saint Anthony of Padua because Romualdo Reyes, the most handsome young man in the town, payed attention to me and asked my father for my hand in marriage. Despite my neighbors’ jealousy, our love will be growing more and more for which I dedicate this exvoto, with all my heart.

Columba Zaragoza ~ Saltillo, Coahuila

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I liked my neighbor very much, and we had a secret affair because she was married. To see each other, we took advantage of her husband often going to business trips. But the other night he suddenly came home. I had to jump out naked through the window so he wouldn’t see me. I thank Saint Charles Borromeo for no one saw me and I could get home. I promise not to get involved with married women anymore.

Facundo R. — Leon, Guanajuato

Two handsome men moved in our building. But then we found out that they turn into horrible vampires at night and fly out of the window to sate their thirst with young girls. My boyfriend and I thank the Virgin of San Juan for we aren’t two juicy chicks.

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Saint Jude, please, do not let my neighbor Paty keep perverting my son Facundo.

Dora Villanueva

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Yesterday, in the yard, we had a funeral banquet for a neighbor. Another neighbor, a living one, 60 years old and quite tipsy from the memorial drink, was sitting opposite me. Focusing his bleary eyes on me, he said “Lena, you’re bery bootiful. Let’s live together!” and vomited right after these words. It was the first time someone proposed me in that manner. Thanks to my Guardian Angel for the neighbor didn’t vomit on me.

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My boyfriend and I were going adventurous and experimenting with new things. We got an idea to make love on the roof, behind the water tank. But we didn’t figure that a neighbor would go there as well to hang her laundry. I asked Saint Barbara for help, and we got an idea to meow like cats so the neighbor didn’t catch us in act. I give thanks for that.

Karla R. ~ Pachuca, Hidalgo

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I give thanks to the Virgin of Guadalupe who finally worked a miracle for me and liberated me from that voyeur neighbor who was always spying on me when I showered.

Señorita Angelica Moreno
Mexico City, 1971

My daughter was a young beautiful girl, and she had many suitors. The bad part was that she was a magnet for the most weird characters in the world. My husband and I looked at all those types who visited my daughter with horror to such degree that when our neighbor’s son began to date her we welcomed him with great enthusiasm, in spite that we always thought he was slightly dumb. We thank because the weird guys don’t come to our house anymore.

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