I thank the Virgin of San Juan because all my daughters inherited my ear for music, the passion and the ability to learn to play various instruments with ease.

Toño Perez thanks the Virgin for being gay and happy. Viva homosexuality!

Mexico, November 21, 2009

The brothers Cosme and Crispin Trejo went to the cemetery to celebrate the November 2 and met a mister who sat on a tomb. He was going to give them a chest full of gold so they would continue with their vice. But suddenly they noticed that it was a skeleton who talked with them. They implored the Virgin of the Solitude for protection, and nothing happened with them. They promised to not drink anymore and to not disturb the dead.

Tlaxcala, 1948

The Juanito’s teacher was so annoying that the boy spent all the time thinking how to get rid of her. He wouldn’t study, and I was afraid he would be kept for a second year. Thanks to my prayers to the Virgin of Zapopan the teacher was changed for another who actually can teach. Now Juanito is very enthusiastic about studying and doing very well.

Because of an infidelity I decided to kill myself and jumped to the bottom of the lake. But thanks to the Virgin of the Rosary my all-life friend Luis Carlos saved me before I would drown. He confessed me that he loved me. And now we are a couple. We thank the Virgin for our happiness.

My husband got ill, and the doctor said that he must stay in bed until he cured. My life became a real night,are. He asked me to bring him in bed some absurd things and after a while he didn’t need them anymore. Or he asked me to cook for him some complicated dishes, but then he left almost everything untouched. I couldn’t sleep because he wanted something even at night. I thank the Virgin of Zapopan because his illness didn’t last for long and he can get up now.

Our house was filled with naughty devils. They made noise, broke everything and were unbearable. I prayed the Virgin of Guadalupe, and she appeared glowing and ordered the demons to obey me in everything. Now the little demons help me to dress up and clean the house. They seem to be pleased doing all this. So we are all happy.

I dedicate this retablo to Saint Ignatius of Loyola. I thank him because my husband finally realized, after I put some pressure on him, that he must stop buying books. We have no more space in our house and we’ve got so many books that we’d never read them all in our lifetime.

Mrs. Bone
March 5, 2009

Pepe Zavaleta got food poisoning with shrimps and almost kicked the bucket. He thanks the Holy Child Doctor for saving his life and promises to be less gluttonous. He brings this retablo in gratitude.

Adriana Herrera worked picking oranges. She used to do it topless to not get hot. Thanks to that her master pay attention to her and they became lovers. She thanks Saint Helen with this retablo for she is not lacking in anything.

When I came back from my mother I found martians sleeping in my bed. They got drunk after the lemonade and fell asleep. I screamed in fear, and they awoke. They escaped through the window and ran to their ship, picking all the lemons from the trees by their way. I thank the Virgin of Zapopan for the martians didn’t do anything to me.

My husband was an old school hippy who used to smoke marijuana all day long. He did it for the inspiration—to draw better. However, instead of this, he became more stupid. One day he began seeing flying cats. He though it was funny. But when the cats smiled at him and started talking with him he got scared. After that he decided to quit smoking. I thank the Virgin because my house doesn’t smell like marijuana anymore and my husband even found a steady job.

I was very lonely but then a devil began visiting me. He was caring and attentive with me. I knew he was a devil, but his gifts conquered me. I thank the Virgin of Guadalupe because she sent me a good man and we fell in love with each other, so I forgot the devil because nothing good would have come of that relationship.